i look at him questioning myself if i can love him. if i can live with him. no, no, dont take me wrong- everything is amazing and his morning coffee tastes like heaven, but it is a relief to know that he plans to go to a grad school - too strange to think that way for me. i became benevolent. i dont care whether he looks at me as his rest-of-his-life woman. i know that people dont change from day to day. but i did.
i changed and all i really care about now is to try to be monogamous. yes, i am going to meet this attractive former football player on Monday. the intentions are right thou. i cant change the fact that the coincidences like this will happen to me and him!
and then i care about him going for that december wedding with me. no, dont promise me you will stay with me for the rest of your life. dont.
dont judge me. you cant judge me for becoming you.
i will have it all
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